Hey there, Wildcats. Unless you've been living under a rock, I'm sure that you've heard that High School Musical 2, the sequel to last year's enormously popular High School Musical came out last weekend. Did you catch up with Troy, Gabriella, Sharpay, and the rest of the gang?

Do I have a point, or am I just trying to make conversation? Well, you don't have to be so mean. But yes, I do have a point. Apparently Disney is pulling out all the stops to make sure you get all HSM2 all the time. They've even made it into a book!

Would you want to read this story? Or do you think this is a cheap marketing ploy? Usually, I enjoy anything that gets people reading. And I do love movies, and singing. And that Zac Efron is just so adorable! But still, when you combine all these elements, does it work?

What do you think? Do you want to read HSM2? When you see that "As seen in the movies" section at Barnes and Noble, do you continue walking? Or do books and movies combine to form the most awesome hybrid ever?

Apparently, there's no rest for the weary. 

That's right, kids. J. K. Rowling, who just finished the Harry Potter series, and who, in my opinion, should be relaxing on a tropical island (her own private one) and sipping fruity drinks with little umbrellas, is writing again.

All of you Potter-philes take note: I know you're hoping upon hope that Ms. Rowling is writing an eighth Potter book. Well, I'm sorry to break it to you, but she's not. Harry is finished. (I'm talking about the book series. I don't know if Harry survived or not in The Deathly Hallows; I haven't had a chance to read it yet. But if I knew, I wouldn't tell you, so don't come back yelling to me about how I spoiled the ending.)

Rowling's new book is going to be a detective novel. And the really cool thing is that she's writing it in the same Scottish café she wrote the Potter books when she was a struggling writer. So now Rowling is officially the richest aspiring novelist out there. It's just like when Jerry Seinfeld goes to comedy clubs and does his stand-up routine. He certainly doesn't need the money, but he does it anyway. Well, good for them.

So, will you read J. K. Rowling's new book when it comes out, or has Rowling fever died? (Possibly like a certain wizard? Did Harry die? Wait ... no, don't tell me. I'm going to read it eventually.) If you were a billionaire, would you continue working? Will you please get me a fruity drink with an umbrella in it?

Editor's Note: It was just brought to our attention that the J. K. Rowling sighting was made up by an over-eager fan. I guess we'll just have to be happy with Harry. For now ...

Legend had it that every year, a figure, cloaked in black with a wide-brimmed hat, sneaked into the graveyard and placed three roses and a bottle of cognac on Edgar Allan Poe's grave. And every year, crowds have gathered at the grave, hoping to catch a glimpse of the mystery man or woman who was honoring the master of the macabre.

But the truth has been revealed. What is that, you ask? It's--the beating of his hideous heart! Ha. No, no. the truth is that it was all a hoax. Turns out, Sam Porpora, a former ad executive, wanted to drum up some publicity for the cemetery. (Wait, you mean tourists aren't usually clamoring to spend their vacations in a dreary cemetery? Shocker!) So old Sam and his tour guides came up with the Poe toaster.

What a disappointment!

It was such a romantic notion. So chilling. So Gothic. So totally Poe.

Well, to express my outrage at the Poe toaster being a complete lie, I thought I'd write a stanza ala Poe's "The Raven."

Once there was a story that was not really gory,
About a man who paid tribute to a famous guy.
Turns out he was faking, leaving us really aching.
He claimed someone came in the dead of night.
But it was just to get the cemetery in the spotlight.
This whole thing was just a lie.

 OK. So I'm no Poe. Here's a better re-imagining of "The Raven," courtesy of The Simpsons. Enjoy!

Stephen King, author of over 58,000 novels about things that go bump in the night, recently went to a bookstore in Australia and vandalized copies of his own books!

What happened was, he went over to the "King section" (a room in the back that is twice the size of the moon) and started etching his signature in blood across the inside front covers.

When employees of the bookstore realized what was happening, they approached King hesitantly (it is common knowledge, you see, that Stephen King is a Werewolf-Vampire-Chupacabra that feeds on the flesh and souls of the innocent.)

"Excuse me," said the first scared-to-near-death employee, "may I ask you what you are doing defacing our property, Mr. King?" Instead of answering her with words, the popular novelist's eyes turned to fire and his hair transformed into a nest of venomous snakes. The employee ran for her life. Unfortunately, King was too quick for her. He sprouted wings and overtook the poor woman in the How-To section of the bookstore. Witnesses at the scene stood in shock as he temporarily satisfied his demon appetite.

As for the books that Mr. King defaced with his bloody John Hancock, they are now listed on eBay.

Caveat Emptor: The books are cursed. Well duh!

At least that's how I heard it anyway. Some other guy tells a different story of what happened here.

Read Stephen King's review of Harry Potter here.

Read an exclusive interview with Stephen King here.